WHO IS SANE OR MAD?

On a cheerful sunny morning, out of his house on the street, at Iba Estate, somewhere at Iyana-Iba, Ojo, a gentleman went on his way, to accomplish his business of the day.

As he walked through the street, intent on his mission, behold, by a street corner near a bus stop was another man. The latter wore a long-sleeved shirt tucked into trousers. Except for his dirty and tangled hair like a rastaman, his bare soiled feet and hands, and beside him a cellophane bag filled with garbage, no one would easily recognise him as a madman perambulating the streets and garbage heaps, making the dogs woof.

As that gentleman passed, the madman giggled and raised his voice high.  Pointing accusatively at him, he bawled, “You there, you are a madman!” Whether this was for fun or the usual symptom of dementia, the witness here cannot tell. But, seriously, the madman kept bawling at the gentleman, “You are mad, don’t you pretend!" He followed him and kept calling to passers-by and bystanders to see the man going yonder to be a madman. And one could even hear some people laugh. Some pointed at the gentleman, perhaps, believing what the madman said. No one could contain such an embarrassment. But the gentleman never stared sideways, refuted the accusation, or rebuked the madman as would be expected. Lo, he bowed his head and walked on with all the giggling and bawling behind him; he was near out of sight. And when the gentleman was out of sight, the madman began to find his way elsewhere. 

After that, in another location, there was another man. He, more like a businessman, a smart aleck in a business suit, was on his way to work. As he came out from the street to the bus stop, behold, that same madman came forth, amidst passers-by, hawkers, loiterers, and commuters. Both men were standing close to each other. While the madman stared curiously at the businessman, or perhaps admiring his suit, the businessman in turn was casting glimpses between the road and his wristwatch. 

Unexpectedly, the mad man bawled, “You suit man there, you are a mad man!” For a split second, people halted in their business, stared, and returned to their business again. At first, the businessman ignored him. He could not determine who his accuser was or whether he was referring to him. The mad man came closer and shouted again: "You are a mad man! Why do you pretend?” The accusation again drew the attention of people. This time, the businessman took to fully assess his accuser, himself, and the people whose eyes were on him. He felt embarrassed. 

And so, wanting to vindicate himself, he shouted back, “I am not mad!” The mad man retorted, “You are mad, oga. You think I don't know you?” "Where do you know me from?" The businessman questioned. "I know you...I know your family... Your sisters... Your brothers...Don't pretend, you smoke colos!" The businessman returned harshly, “I don't smoke and don't know you. Get out of my way, you fool!” This time, the madman came face-to-face with him and poked at him. “Don’t you see you are really mad!”

The businessman became not only embarrassed but also irate. But, he backed away and observed again. He noticed his accuser was barefoot, and his hands were soiled. His hair was tangled and his face was shaded by grime. He perceived a foul smell from him that could only be that of a mad person. The businessman yelled, “I am not mad. It is you who is mad!” He wanted to leave the scene but did not. The mad man came at him bawling, “It is you who is mad, not me!” And so the two became intensely engaged and the argument was fiercely heated. Passers-by stopped and people left their business to witness the fray, not necessarily to mediate. Soon, the few onlookers became a baffled and jeering crowd. Two sane men raving at each other like that was unusual. 

The exchange happened to get out of hand. The businessman profuse with anger at the embarrassment could not contain it anymore. In an instant, he raised his hand and struck the madman on the face. And then the madman went into action. He grabbed and tugged at the businessman's suit and within a second ripped it. Of course, it was tit for tat. Thus, both men became locked in a tussle.

A whale of a crowd gathered. Each person would want to know from another who was mad or whether both men were. The enforcers of the law arrived on the scene to disband the public nuisance. The mad man was the first to bawl, “Officer, arrest this man, he is a mad man!” The businessman, subdued and panting from the fray, cried, “It is a lie; he is the one who is mad!” The officers convinced by their tattered looks that both men are mad, seized and gagged them. They headed for the asylum.